Special China Virus Edition!
Heinessights are always 20/20 and the latest China Virus Edition of Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages is certainly no exception.
With a whole new chapter of China Virus jokes, and a slew of new one liners added to our other chapters, this is a book you cannot afford to miss.
You don’t want to miss out on classics like these:
“Southern Governors have issued edicts to their respective states;
“She was wearing a mask,” is still not legal grounds for sleeping with your sister.
Enlightenment? Spiritual Oneness? It’s All Here
If you’re looking for guidance on subjects like dating, the military, politics or the history of town names in Washington State, you have arrived!
You need look no farther than Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages.
People pay gurus and spiritual leaders thousands of dollars for the spiritual enlightenment available from just a few Heinessights!
Guidance and Chuckles
Heinessights will not only enlighten you, this book will enlighten and amuse you at the same time.
Take for example, this observation about life in the Army:
★ “In the 82nd Airborne, they said everyone should be, “high and tight.”
★ “It took a long time before I realized they were talking about my hair and not my underwear.”
Heinessights Are For Everyone!
You will soon see how many social benefits are available when you read Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages.
At social gatherings and funerals, you can keep your friends amused with these quips, witticisms and lifelong observations.
If you’re really desperate, you can even pass the Heinessights you share off as your own.
Take advantage of dating advice like this:
★ “I once dated someone who told me she was a showgirl. When it came to our dates, she never showed.”
Washington State Bonus Heinessights
Of course, if you’re living in Washington, you’re gonna get an extra benefit from the fact the author grew up in Sequim.
★ Just the sentence, “I grew up in Sequim,” is like saying, “I have psychological issues.”
Beyond that there is Seattle, or what is more commonly known as Urine Town.
Out of Place
Finally, the Washingtonian is going to be thrilled to read about the alleged origin of some of Washington’s favorite burgs.
★ “Washington State Place Names: Quilcene – What happens when your porcupine throws a tantrum.
Be the first at your next picnic, church social or clam bake to spout off a few Heinessights and let the knee-slapping begin!
Order your copies today!
“If you’re wearing a mask, they can’t see you laughing at them.” – Ancient Chinese Secret Proverb
Matthew Heines is an author and veteran of the US 82nd Airborne Division with over twenty years of experience teaching in the USA, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia and the Sultanate of Oman. Matthew Heines has six books currently in publication titled, My Year in Oman, Another Year in Oman, Killing Time in Saudi Arabia, Deceptions of the Ages, The Rainier Paradigm and Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages. Currently living near Seattle, in Washington State, Matthew Heines is active in politics and has run, and is currently running for the US House of Representatives.